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How to Really Have a Happy New Year

The New Year always starts with goals, a vision, how to be better, how to be more, and how to grow which is always great to be future focused. It can also be overwhelming. I don’t know about you but my year started off more on the wrong foot then on the path to a better me. I worked a ton, provided for others, organized closets and rooms to start the year with a clean headspace, and pushed forward with all my might. Sometimes I push so hard that I don’t even think about what I’m pushing for or enjoy my days. I’m so focused on being a better mom that I forget my kids already think I’m a good mom. I’m so focused on being a better version of me that I forget to be me.

Goals and Action Steps

I don’t usually set resolutions but I do set goals and action steps often during the year. I am a driver so I enjoy the action more than the actual goal setting. However I have discovered I can easily get so caught up in the forward focus that I’m oblivious to enjoying the present time. That on my path to making everything “perfect” for my family I’m actually making everyone around me miserable. That my kids would rather we do a huge, messy project then have their rooms organized by color and game type. I envision my life like a Pottery Barn catalog when in fact that’s about as boring and non-fun as it can get for my kids.

Luckily for me my husband and my family accepts these things about me and knows exactly how to bring me back down to reality. Tony knows that when I get in my “everything has to be perfect” panic attacks that I need a little time to myself, an adjustment, and a whole lotta sweat (seriously a long run is so good for my soul…and yes, I am that weird runner no one understands that truly becomes a different person after a long run). I tried for a long to time to change my flaws and that crazy part of my brain that expects perfection and it’s never worked. I’ve learned it’s just me and I’ve learned  instead of taking something away it’s much easier to add in more of the good things. More laughs with my kids, more time being in the moment, and more time celebrating the things I’m doing right. When you fill your mind with the good things there’s less time for the moments of self doubt.

Fill Your Needs First

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So as you set your forward focused goals make sure to fill up your headspace with all the things you’re doing right too. If you’re setting goals for your family remember a fulfilled YOU is how you can be a great spouse, parent, friend, and fulfill those other important relationships. Fill yourself and your needs first so you can take the necessary action to meet all those other goals you are setting.

And enjoy the ride. My biggest fear is one day I will have met every single one of my goals only to realize I chased with such a fury that I didn’t celebrate my accomplishments. That I was so focused on always trying to be a better version of me that I forgot I am already enough. My hope for you and me is that 2017 is filled with action to be the best version of ourselves but that the action never overtakes being present and enjoying every moment of the ride to get there. Happy New Year!

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